admission(to)dartmouth

So. Here it is, isn't it? April 1st, the big day, the make-or-break moment; the email, the letter, the link; the decision. The decision. You want to come to Dartmouth -- does Dartmouth want you? Are you good enough? Why did you get in? Why didn't you? What will you do now? The questions I asked myself; the questions you should, perhaps, try to avoid.

Dartmouth wasn't my top choice. It wasn't my last choice. I honestly thought I wouldn't care whether or not I got in; and when I went to visit, I honestly didn't care whether or not I went. I was waitlisted at nearly every school I applied to, and rejected from the rest, save Dartmouth and two "safeties." And by the time I got my admissions letter from Dartmouth, I was so down about the ambivalent and negative responses I'd gotten from everywhere else that I felt rejected no matter what happened. I thought that because I didn't get in to my first choice, they didn't want me; because I didn't get in to my father's alma mater, I wasn't good enough. But after countless hours of discussion and deliberation, I signed my commitment letter, and slowly it dawned on me -- I was committed. Dartmouth was my school. Dartmouth would be my home. Dartmouth wanted me! And slowly but surely, as the summer unfolded, I became more and more proud of Dartmouth -- I started to find and remember things that I liked about it; started looking at dorms and classes and activities, until a school I didn't give a second thought to became a school I couldn't wait to attend.

Which means this: Dartmouth is not an objective place. If you ask every person on campus what Dartmouth means, I bet you'll get as many answers as there are students. It's more than the tired phrase, "College is what you make it" -- it's that Dartmouth, or any college, while burdened with stereotypes and an overarching identity, really isn't anything in particular. You'll find something you love (hopefully lots of things!) no matter where you go. College, more than anything, is a time for you to go exploring until you find what you love -- granted, that might be easier at some places than at others, but nowhere is it impossible.

Don't consider your admissions letter from Dartmouth in terms of personal validation. You sent in paper, grades, and maybe a video of yourself playing a sport or an instrument. But that's not you -- you're more than essays and marks and activities; but admissions offices don't get to see that. If a school sends you a rejection, it's not you they're rejecting, but the "you" that they've created from a couple of pieces of paper. And when you're accepted, that means that, for better or for worse, the "you" that the admissions office sees seems like a good fit for that particular school's environment. It's hard to get beyond blaming yourself (or blaming the school, for that matter) for a rejection, but it's not fair to place that burden anywhere. Focus as much as you can on the positives of the college process -- getting a chance to express yourself, show your interests and accomplishments, having the opportunity to try for something that means a lot to you -- because no other process will ever be quite like it.

If you get in to Dartmouth today, you're going to have an amazing four years. If you don't get into Dartmouth, you're still going to have an amazing four years. If you get into Dartmouth and all the other schools you wanted to, don't push Dartmouth aside -- give it a chance, because it's a wonderful place. Picking a college is like picking who you want to be: do you want to choose a place where you can continue along your path from high school, or where you can be someone new, stretch yourself, set yourself up to become the person you want to be in four years. Neither is the better choice -- just make sure you're choosing not only what you want now, but what you're going to want when you're older, when home is in a different state, when your family becomes the people who live across the hall, sit next to you in class, share a table at the dining hall.

My promise to you, anonymous blog-readers, is that if you want to be happy in college, you'll be happy. Wherever you go. And if, for some reason, you're not, there are other schools, and other years for exploring. But for now, make the most of what you have -- because it could be incredible.